Emerald’s Interviews: Interview with the Elf-Lord


      Hello, and welcome to Emerald’s Interviews, where yours truly takes the time to interview characters from movies, TV shows, and books. No character is too secondary or obscure to get their fifteen minutes of fame on Emerald’s Interviews!

     Today we have a special guest for all you Middle-Earth fans out there. Direct from the halls of Valinor itself, we’re here live with Glorfindel of Rivendell! Glorfindel, thank you so much for taking the time for this interview.

      “It was my pleasure, Emerald. We don’t get many requests to do interviews here in the Undying Lands. We don’t get many visitors, come to think of it…how exactly did you get here?”

     That’s not important at the moment. So, Glorfindel, how have you been since sailing from the Grey Havens? It’s hard for those of us who are left behind to imagine what it’s like here.

     “Well, Valinor can never be what it was before the Light of the Trees was destroyed, but it’s still a place of beauty and peace and unending song. The Valar, of course, rule justly and wisely in Iluvatar’s name—really, it’s quite like how Middle-Earth would have been if Morgoth hadn’t disrupted the song. Plus, we have great wifi.”

     So I’m guessing the wifi lets you see some of the world outside?

     “Yes, it’s quite fascinating to see how much Arda has changed. The wifi didn’t do us much good at first because no one East of the Sea had it—I wish the technology had developed faster there; it would have been nice to use it to communicate with those who had yet to board the ships. But now that Men have figured out how it works, it makes a good bridge between our lands.”

     Do many Elves use the Internet?

     “It’s mainly the younger ones who take a more active interest although Cirdan’s YouTube channel has over a million subscribers. We’re not sure why; all he talks about is shipbuilding. He’ll drone on and on in a voice that could lull a dragon to sleep.”

     If you have Internet access, you must know about Peter Jackson’s adaptations of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings. How have the films been received over here?

     “Well, when Peter Jackson first announced his plans for The Lord of the Rings, we were all tremendously excited. We couldn’t believe that after all these years our story was finally going to get the Hollywood blockbuster treatment. There was a bit of resentment, though, when some Elves were called to New Zealand for filming and others weren’t.”

     What about you? Your rescue role in The Fellowship of the Ring was given to Arwen, and the Council of Elrond was drastically shortened, cutting short your role in that as well. How did you react?

     “Well, I was a little upset when I learned that Arwen would be rescuing Aragorn and the hobbits in my place, and, of course, I was shocked to see that Jackson cut so much material from the Council of Elrond. It felt like a betrayal, really—we were locked in that room for hours, and in the movie, everything’s resolved in five minutes! But going back to your original question, yes, I was upset to see how much my role had been cut from the book. As time went on, though, I realized I was lucky to be in the film at all. Sure, I was in the background in a few scenes and didn’t have any lines, but in the long run I fared better than some of the others. Old Bombadil and Goldberry didn’t appear at all, but that might be because no one knows where they are right now. If the Elves can’t even find him, I suppose it would be a bit much to expect a movie director to track him down.

     “The twins took it hard when they weren’t called, though. Poor Elladan and Elrohir were really looking forward to being in the movie. They spent hours sitting by the phone. Elladan got the idea they should pretend to be some of the other Elves who got called in and make their way onto the set like that, but Elrohir pointed out that their father would recognize them. They were just so, so sad.”

     What was the general reaction to the finished products?

     “It was one of amusement, mostly—none of us were expecting them to be so funny. The Nazgul, oh, the Nazgul were so off-base! I realize Peter Jackson never dwelt in the Blessed Realm and has no idea what the Unseen look like, but come on! He wasn’t even trying with them!”

      Were all the details that inaccurate?

     “No, the films were mostly spot-on with the architecture. And they did a wonderful job replicating the scenery. The background material was mostly correct, but the way they portrayed it was nothing short of hilarious. The films are a huge hit whenever we pull them out for Comedy Tuesday.”

     Does everyone really find them that entertaining?

     “Well, no, not everyone. Mithrandir and the three Halflings who were the Ring-bearers take some offense at how events are portrayed. Gimli, too, grumbles a lot at how he was turned into comic relief—and yet he’ll always stay and watch.”

     How do the other cast members who are in Valinor feel about their portrayal in the films?

     “Oh, they had a blast with filming! And whenever they watch the finished products, they always have the biggest grins on their faces. The Lady Galadriel always says that working on the movies was the most fun she’s had in centuries, and I’ve heard Legolas remark on more than one occasion that he wishes he had done half of the stunts in real life that they had him doing in the movies. But I think the general feeling is a mixture of amusement and flattery—amusement because the real story wasn’t quite like what the films showed, flattery because they’re honored that humans believe they were so incredible.”

     This has been a very interesting interview, Glorfindel. Thank you for your time.

     “Do you have to leave now? This was just getting good. Besides, Lindir’s getting some scones out of the oven, and his scones are legendary. You have to try some before you leave.”

     Well, I suppose I can stay for a little longer…

     Thank you for joining us for another exciting episode of Emerald’s Interviews! Whom will we interview next time? Where will our literary escapades take us next? Will the Elves actually let me leave Valinor, or will they keep stuffing me with scones? Find out next time on Emerald’s Interviews.

By Emerald

(Read more of Emerald’s works at My Turn to Talk)